Love, Life and Betrayal
by iloveharrypotter4eva
Summary: hermione has liked harry since her 1st year at hogwarts, ginny knows but when harry asks out ginny she accepts ignoring the fact that hermione has liked harry all along.PLEASE review to see how much you like it, will get much better.
1. The Begining

**_Disclaimer:_ I dont own anything ! (runs away crying )**

Ginny and I had been friends since my first year at Hogwarts when I met Rons family over the summer. I have also liked Harry since then . Ginny had known this all along.

**_T_**hree years later Ginny and I were sitting at the edge of the Gryffindor balcony, talking or more accurate Ginny was talking I was just there listening (sort of) and feeling worse than ever. Ginny was talking about how wonderful it had been when Harry asked her out when he kissed Ginny after the quidditch game Harry won.

Harry had somehow always won and been the hero again. Ginny was a very good friend to me but sometimes she was a bit hollow in the head for example she would always forget what Hermione would say and sometimes even turn the things around. And her memory was extremely bad. But she was a good trustful friend that was always there when i needed it.

"He is so handsome with his unruly hair and deep green eyes" Ginny continued "I can't believe you don't like him at all" Ginny said. Hermione opened her mouth to protest but decided against it.

See what I said, she must have learned by now how much I like Harry, for instance every time id see Harry I would forget all my troubles and then just go on sighing like crazy (I cant help it) and I would go on jumping around how handsome Harry is. How could Ginny not remember?

"Oh my gosh, he is so hot and the most handsome guy in the year and he asked me out!" I kept quiet as Ginny continued her story on how brave and handsome and muscular Harry was (muscular? How did she know that not even I knew that, have they shagged before?)

No, they couldn't have. I just turned around in my seat my back facing Ginny tears welled in my eyes clouding my beautiful view of the forbidden Forrest and Hagrids hut down below.

How could Ginny be so stupid and say yes on being Harry's new girlfriend. Ginny knew perfectly on how much I like Harry.

It was impossible not to know, I would not have to tell you so you could figure it out you would just have to see me around Harry and you would instantly know. "Hermione are you listening?" Ginny said to me in an arrogant voice.

"Yeah of course, I was listening" I said trying to smile. That moment Harry came up the stairs his beautiful eyes on Ginny and his beautiful hair whipping the air behind him.

I tried hard to suppress a sigh; he completely ignored me and went straight to snogging Ginny even before Gnny could say Hi. I just said id see them later something that probably sounded more like a croak, I slowly walked down the steps and once I was out of their view I ran down the rest of the way, tears blurring the rest of the way.


	2. Ginny of Gryffindor

I sat at the library trying to study for their herbology test but the image of Harry and ginny snogging kept on haunting me.

I cried for an hour or so till the page of the book was almost soaked, "inaqua" (the spell to remove water). I was so depressed, tired and cried so easily lately, even Ron seemed more annoying to me so stupid and thick.

Ron was just trying to help cheer me up, because although Ron had confessed how much he liked me he accepted it when he learned I liked Harry not him. "Don't you hate ginny?" Ron asked pulling me away from my thoughts.

"Why should I hate her she's my only friend" I said.

"There's Parvati and lavender aren't they you're friends aren't me and Harry you're friends?"

"No, they aren't my friends they're sluts, I don't hang out with that kind of people, and they're kind of like pansy." I said as Ron laughed almost falling out of his seat.

"No, they aren't that bad 'cause pansy has shagged every single boy in slytherin, maybe even snape." he said with a grin.

I laughed really hard I almost died on chocking, when in was able to calm myself down I was much better.

"I don't think you'd like a friend like that, ginny isn't very nice snogging Harry in front of you."

My laughing stopped, "She doesn't do it on purpose she just gets carried away and forgets; besides she completely forgot that I ever told her how much I loved Harry." I commented.

Just as we spotted Harry and ginny coming in, as always walking so close they were practically on each other, if you would think of an image of Harry and ginny nowadays you wouldn't be able to think of a time were they were not snogging, being much to close or shagging. (Eww).

Next to me Ron groaned he wasn't used to seeing his best friend and sister so close. Slut.

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	3. Pain

The teachers were lately giving them stacks of homework; there afternoons extremely busy on their homework's especially I since everyone wanted me to do their homework.

That wasn't it there was the N.E.W.T.S she had to study for. I was also expected Malloy to insult me anytime he would see me, but he was acting odd, he would pass me and look up at me and blush.

No shit! He couldn't have a crush on me, could he? He was always being all mean to me why should he like me?

On Friday during the feast I was going to finish my homework somewhere quite, like the library. "Granger" I heard an arrogant voice _noooooo not him! _

Immediately I thought of turning and running the opposite way maybe I could go out to the lake and study there.

I heard Malloy scoff "fine, Hermione" his voice was odd, friendly.

_Uh oh. _I decided to turn around, he was sitting on the table his feet swinging under him back and forth back and forth his platinum blonde hair covering most of his face, he looked… I thought for a moment what word to describe him?

"So what's up, Gra- Hermione" he looked awfully uncomfortable saying my name.

"The sky Malfoy, what do you want?"

"Sweetheart you don't need to bite of my head" he said getting up and caressing my cheek. I flinched, "Im not you're sweetheart"

Now he was only inches of my face I backed up to get away from him but he cornered me onto a desk, he kissed me so softly it felt like a light breeze on my lips, I could have pushed him away but I was frozen in place.

He smiled at me and left. In my head I thought of the word I was looking for; handsome. Wow, what a slytherin sex god_. Riiiiight. _I laughed and sat down and did my work

At the feast, Harry and ginny eat some and snogged a while like always. I couldn't believe it Ginny had always been a very good girl now she was very indecent, acting like some scarlet women. It was too much, it was disgusting.

People would pass by and say things like "Get a bed" or "Twenty points from Gryffindor".

"Dear Dear this people obviously don't know how to respect such a beautiful relationship"said Ginny.

I rolled my eyes, this was my friend Ginny? I kind of knew this side of Ginny, she was always like this with her other boyfriends but now she was with Harry so the kissing was a bit wilder now.

Then there was Harry, the way he was acting with Ginny really surprised me, he was a man-whore or whatever, I couldn't believe it with Ginny he was always sucking on her face. It's Monday morning, I was eating pancakes and bacon (my favorite), when Harry enters…alone.

He sits down,sigh he looks so handsome with his beautiful green eyes and his robes fit him so beautifully…athletic (heehee) today after staring at him for a while "where's Ginny?" he started chocking.

"Oh my god Harry are you okay?" I said quickly standing up and whacking him on the back. Everyone turned around to see what the commotion was.

"Hermione, careful not to kill him." I gave Ron a _really_ dark look. When Harry could finally catch his breathe he just glanced over at Ginny who was talking with Parvati and Lavender, they were _all _wearing very revealing clothes, they did that only when they were all single,

" Oh, Im so sorry Harry, I didn't know you had broken up with Ginny." He hugged me and cried into my shoulder, the last time he cried was when Sirius fell behind the curtain, he hadn't cried when Cho ditched him for some other boy.

"Harry Im sorry, but get off people are staring." I blushed. He really liked Ginny I sighed. "She said that our love for each other was dying and that I wasn't the boy she thought I was." He looked so sad and fragile an still he looked so handsome.

"I wouldn't have dumped you, I mean you're so handsome and all…" Oops.

"I know I'm handsome Hermione, but she dumped me!" Humph, talk about conceited.

Great, Ginny had just dumped Harry Potter, 'the boy who lived.' That moment Ginny stood up walked over to the Slytherin table. Oh no, this couldn't end well.

Ginny stood in front of Malloy who seemed to be talking to Crabbe and Goyle, they were laughing then they stopped they whispered something to Malloy.

As he turned around to face Ginny she kissed him, the Great hall went silent, as they say you could have heard a pin drop. Ron and I gasped, what the heck is she doing? Ron blushed and sank low in his seat.

Malfoy grabbed Ginny and kissed her, the way Harry and Ginny used to, I had to admit I was surprised, any other time Draco would have slapped her or pushed her away he would've done something… Malfoyish.

He would have never snogged a 'Weasley'; "Don't use me, you Weasley" I tried really hard not to laugh.

The rest of the days were still, Harry and Ginny were avoiding each other a lot, and when they couldn't be kept away they seemed to want to kill each other and all because Ginny had kissed the Slytherin sex god: Draco Malfoy.

I was sitting in the Gryffindor common room re- reading Hogwarts: A history when suddenly I felt nervous scared and felt like I wanted to run and hide.

I got up and started looking for Harry, as I ran past clans of students I felt that this wasn't good I always got this feeling when Harry was in trouble.

"Hey watch it!" said a Slytherin. When I stopped running outside near hagrids hut, I saw Ron and Draco coated in blood the grass was also red and wet. Ron had his robes badly torn and a bruised eye, Draco on the other side only had a scar on his right cheek, it made him look more mischievous, and handsome.

I quickly sprinted down the steps. "Stop, Stop!"

"NO-HE –KISSED- MY- SISTER- IM- NOT- GOING- TO- LET -MALFOY –GET- AWAY- WITH- IT!" Ron was sadly attempting to catch his breathe and avoid Malfoy's continues blows.

I sadly shook my head and stood there with my arms crossed, "Expelliarmus" I said summoning their wands, I didn't want them to get any more hurt, I thought chuckling.

Just then Ron tried to punch Draco in the face, but Draco just flipped Ron on the ground, and stood on rons' back pulling his arm behind his back.

"Ow ow ow let go of me Malfoy!"

"No you came to fight me, now try to defeat me, Weasley!" Dracos' hair was in his face he looked very hot standing their on Ron as twitched hopelessly on the ground.

Ouch, that looked painful. "Let go of him Malfoy, didn't you ever learn not to pick on someone smaller than you?" Ron gave me a dirty look, Draco just grinned at me, and I grinned back.

I pulled Ron of the ground and yes, he was very heavy, Draco turned around to face us and kicked Ron below the stomach as Ron twisted in pain on the floor I handed back their wands.

"It's not my fault Weasley that you're sister is such a slut." Draco said not looking at Ron but at me, I looked away blushing.

I was surprised that not every single student in Hogwarts was watching, because usually when fights or duels everyone would come running and see the fight. Draco sighed, picked up his bag and left, turning around and blowing a kiss to me.

Why does he have to do that? I dragged Ron the opposite way to the hospital wing. "I don't want you fighting over Ginny's bad actions of being some kind of person who sells herself"- rons opens his mouth but its to painful for him

"As I was saying, ginny is grown enough to know what she is doing, she doesn't need to get her brother beat-up cause of her."

"Hermione you see how I left his face?"

"Wow a scar, you should see yourself Ron."

"Ron you have about four broken bones, two missing teeth, one broken arm, a bruised lip, eye and Oh yeah, he punched you in the crotch." As I left Ron at the infirmary, I thought I don't know how I feel about Harry anymore, I want to think I don't like him anymore but when I see him I forget I want to hate him, how I don't want to have a crush on him anymore.

I could go out with anyone I'd want, many guys have asked me out, but i've refused, hoping someday Harry would ask me out. Why does Ginny ignore the fact that I like Harry?

Why does- "Harry what are you doing here?" "I go to school here, remember?" he said chuckling.

"Yeah I know, but why aren't you with Ginny?"

"Oh, that girl." He said sadly obviously not wanting to talk about her.

"Harry I-… I need to tall you something, come." I couldn't believe what I was going to do. As we walked outside to the lake ,it was a beautiful day, the lake was calm and you could hear the giant squid screeching.

"Harry, I…" I couldn't explain such a delicate thing, so I kissed him; it was just small peck on the lips.

"I've felt some thing really special for you for a very long time, Ginny knew but she totally ignored it, I love you Harry."

His eyes bulged,"

"No, No, No, NO! Hermione I could never like you more than a friend, I love ginny not you," he said wrinkling his nose; he didn't like me like I expected.

"I couldn't ever go out with you or anything, CAUSE I DON'T LIKE YOU HERMIONE ACTUALLY, I HATE YOU, GINNY KNEW YOU LIKED ME THAT'S WHY SHE DUMPED ME! " I HATE YOU HERMIONE GRANGER!" he was screaming and he now hated me instead of liking me, I felt my heart shatter. He just turned around and walked back to the castle.

As I slowly walked back to the dormitories, I thought of the time when 14 house elves had to clean the blood from a girl in Hufflepuff, she had lived but she still remained with many scars on her arms, back, legs everywhere. She had tried to kill herself because everyone would make fun of her. I grabbed my razor from my room and went into the bathroom.

**_WARNING: NOT TRUE DON'T DO IT! YOU ARE GOING TO SUFFER AND NOT DIE LEAVING YOURSELF RETARDED! IT'S NOT A JOKE! DON'T TRY THIS ANYWHERE! PLEASE!_**

I brought down the razor on my veins, it didn't hurt as I expected, it felt good, relaxing, as if it were less pain than that of Harry telling me how much he hated me because I liked him.

I stripped till I was only in my underwear, I cut deeper into my veins, then I went to cutting deeply into other parts of my body.

Anywhere were there was a vein I cut into it. I saw the blood rush down my body and soundlessly fall onto the floor. The white tile floor was soon covered in big pools of blood; the blood started rushing down faster by every passing moment.

"Why does Harry not like me like I do, I spent half my life drooling after him, thinking that someday we were going to go out and be happy forever. I lived in such a stupid fairy tale!

CURSE HARRY POTTER!" I then fell from above the toilet seat on to the floor. Everything seemed so blurry now, I felt weak, and I couldn't move at all, much less cut myself more. I wanted to end up like that girl in Hufflepuff, with one exception: Dead. CURSE HARRY POTTER!


	4. Darkness

How long how I been there lying on the floor I don't know but I felt extremely light, if it weren't for the blood weighing me down Im sure I could have floated away.

I felt weak and I was starting to regret this all, why had I told Harry? If I live how will I ever be able to face him? It would be extremely embarrassing and we wouldn't be able to friends anymore.

At the same time I felt sad and happy, this was all so confusing. "Bombardo!" uh-oh, I tried to move away from the door but it was completely useless, unless I could have slide away on the blood.

As the door exploded into a trillion pieces Professor Dumbledore came in, after him came Professor Mc Gonagall when she saw me she gasped "Miss Granger, how could you."

I couldn't help but feel a twinge of satisfaction, only in my darkest dreams had I dared to be bad and rebel against everyone and anyone, but I hadn't told that to anyone.

Everything became blurry and dizzy "Why is everything moving?" I blurted. "Professor, call Madame Pomfrey I fear we can't move Miss Granger."

He told her as she left. He turned to look at me and smiled gently at me, "Everything is moving because you have almost lost every drop of you're blood, you're going into a vegetable state." Why had I tried to kill myself? Oh yeah, Harry. The very name brought pain to my heart.

My breath became more labored now, it was harder to breathe as if my air hole was closing up, air was escaping me, and my lungs were collapsing without air. "Professor, hurry she is leaving us, hurry!"

Why did he try to save me if I die my death will be on Harry's conscience forever, then he will regret ever saying how he hated me. Then everything gave a mighty shake before all went black…


	5. Thunder after the storm

I woke up in the hospital wing; I was still weak and couldn't move at all. Harry had turned me into someone I never dreamed before to be, I was no longer the bookworm I used to be, the girl that everyone used to push around.

I was now a girl that had attempted against her life. Ughhh. Im still alive, what will I do now; no one will look at me the same.

I was now a girl who was mad at life just because of Harry; it was incredible how a person could create so much chaos upon another.

Draco came in, "hi" he said awkwardly. "Hi Malfoy" . Silence, in my mind I thought why he was here.

So this was weird, the boy I had thought was my enemy was no visiting me. I had to seriously rethink who were my friends and enemies.

Harry…. The very name shot a pain through my heart. I shifted around uncomfortably. "Soooo…. what happened." He asked, sitting on my bed. Okay…..

I stayed quite, "Rumours say you tried to kill yourself," "is it true?"

"Who is saying that!" I panicked, maybe it was one of the teachers.

He looked at me in the eyes, "Potter" I lost my breathe. Draco looked at me pitifully with pain in his eyes.

"He's telling everyone how you tried to kill yourself over him."

"The worst thing is, he says with pride!" he said angrily, he stood up and walked around briskly.

He looked so handsome, his beautiful blond hair covering over his left eye. He shook his head to the left to get his hair out of his eye.

Ooooooh. He suddenly came up to me till we were only inches apart, "Would you like me to beat him up for you?" he said excitedly.

I couldn't help to chuckle, nice, first he calls me a mudblood then he wants to defend me from my ex best friend.

Woah. "No, its okay, I rather not bring any more attention to myself, for now at least."

The rest of the week went quietly, I quickly became bored, no classes, no homework.

Not even magic, except for the magic Madam Pomfrey had to use to heal my scars. On Thursday she brought me a mirror, I almost screamed when I saw myself.

Scars covered my face and most of my body. Madam explained she could get rid of all the scars.

But I decided to keep just one, one shaped like a thunder on my heart.

what do you think so far? **PLEASE REVIEW**... IM THINKING OF ADDING A NEW CHARACTER.


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